Archie Gemmill scored a dream goal for Scotland against Holland in 1978
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England: No, you didn't read it wrong. It genuinely appears that support for England's World Cup campaign is building among the northern neighbours. Last week, current Scotland boss Craig Levein claimed "it would be good" if Fabio Capello's side won the World Cup, seemingly bringing to an end centuries of antagonism that pre-date William Wallace's cry for "freedom".
The head of a Tartan Army supporters' group quickly rebuffed Levein's outrageous olive branch, saying: "We just hope they lose every game." It seemed as though parity had been restored and all was right with the world again.
But no, Scotland legend Archie Gemmill - who scored an extraordinary World Cup goal against Netherlands in 1978, now best known for the intense pleasure it brought Renton in the film Trainspotting - has thrown another spanner in the works by suggesting that he is, wait for it, indifferent to the prospect of England succeeding in South Africa.
"It is fascinating. There are possibly eight teams who can quite easily win it and England are obviously one of them," Gemmill said. "You have got Brazil, Argentina, Italy, Holland, you can go on. If England win it, then they deserve to win it, it's as simple as that. No problem for me at all, it won't change my life."
I'm not sure too many of your compatriots agree, Archie.
Ivory Coast: If you received a letter of invitation from the National Elephants Supporters' Committee, you'd be forgiven for being pretty excited about the prospect of going to the zoo to see some lengthy trunks in action.
Just imagine then the delight on the faces of 100 Ivory Coast football fans, when they realised that their letters weren't from an animal preservation group at all, but in fact invites to watch Sven Goran Eriksson's side compete at the World Cup finals.
Supporters of Sven's Elephants (the nickname for the national side if that hasn't been gathered yet), have been rewarded with free, all-inclusive tickets to watch Didier Drogba and Co. in action in South Africa, after a random draw of members of the country's chief fans' group.
"Their plane ticket, hotel, meals, transportation will all be taken care of," Elephants fan club media officer Kassoum Diakite said. "The only thing they'll need is a passport and a vaccination card."
The fans will join an official delegation of 500 people heading to South Africa ahead of Ivory Coast's first match, against Portugal on June 15 in Port Elizabeth. The trip also includes tickets to the other group games, against Brazil in Johannesburg and North Korea in Nelspruit.
"We'd love to stay longer, but we're only staying for the first three games," Diakite said. "If the Elephants make it through, it will be really hard to leave."
It costs just $4 to be a member of the National Elephants Supporters' Committee, while the trips to South Africa were being advertised at the princely sum of $4000 by local tour operators - and the lucky Ivorian fans will be given orange polo shirts, jackets and hats to keep them warm in the stadiums. Bargain.
Nemanja Vidic gets on the mic.
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Serbia: You could have been forgiven for thinking that Nemanja Vidic had been overtaken by the spirit of Hull boss Phil Brown when he grabbed a microphone during the second half of Serbia's 1-0 defeat to New Zealand. Thank goodness he wasn't.
No, instead the Serbian defender was trying to calm down the rioting 'fans' [and I use the term as loosely as possible] in order to keep the match going.
With everyone keeping such a close watch out for South African criminals, is anyone actually going to be looking INSIDE the stadiums?
Spain: Ready the excuses. Your team just scrapes a 3-2 win over an unfancied opponent. There must be some reason for it? Especially if you're one of the favourites? Well, Spanish keeper Iker Casillas has joined the long list of complainers who are expressing anger at the design of the ball to be used at the World Cup.
"It's sad that such an important competition like the World Cup has such an important element like this ball of appalling condition," he said.
England's Joe Hart and Brazil's Julio Cesar have already got their excuses in early with criticism of the 'Jabulani' ball. Still, at least we could see a few goals this summer.