Rod Liddle always pulls no punches when it comes to dishing out a verbal assault, and it's certainly no different this Sunday as he passes comment on the hilarious goings on at Newcastle United.

The subject of his ire, and a certain ESPN Soccernet columnist will sit there nodding with hand on chin, is Dennis Wise. Yes, the little man brought in to oversee the Magpies' empire just when things looked to be going belly-up at Leeds United.

I don’t think Jesus Christ tried to claim £10m compensation when it all went tits up in the Garden of Gethsemane. But then, unlike Kevin Keegan, Jesus only had the malefactions of Judas Iscariot and the Roman occupying force with which to contend; he was not bedevilled by Dennis Wise. I like the notion of Wise being one of the disciples, though; St Dennis, the Fisher of Men (via YouTube) who betrayed his boss to curry favour with two South American agents. It seems scarcely possible that Newcastle United could be the source of even more humour this season, after they gave of themselves so selflessly last year. But then you read of what went on once Keegan was appointed, detailed with frank incredulity by the panel which adjudicated in the Keegan v Newcastle case, which ended with the Messiah being awarded £2m plus interest.

The panel effectively confirmed that the club lied through its teeth, concurring with Keegan’s claim that it “repeatedly and intentionally misled the press, the public and the fans”.

Quite strong there from Mr Liddle in The Times. But he goes on.

Having appointed Keegan, to the delight of Newcastle’s fervent-but-often-deluded following, the board clearly sat down and thought: “Now, what can we do that will really screw him up?” And as one, they arrived at the only answer possible: appoint Dennis Wise to squat on his shoulders, causing trouble. Wise’s qualifications for whatever title he acquired at St James’ Park rested on his managerial performance at Millwall, where he took Mark McGhee’s decent Championship side to the brink of relegation through the signing of some truly shocking players, and a period of copious under-achievement at Leeds United, where most people believe the clever work was done by Gus Poyet.

And finally.

What possessed Newcastle to believe it needed Wise? Why would anyone believe he could make things better? And remarkably, just when things seemed to be looking more optimistic, they whipped the carpet from beneath Keegan’s feet, humiliated the man and, pretty much, ensured relegation.

It is perhaps the case that Keegan might not have been the most judicious appointment. It was, instead, a form of playing to the Gallowgate gallery, at the expense of competence and realism. But having appointed Keegan, they might at least have let the poor chap get on with doing the job. There was more playing to the gallery later when, distraught at the prospect of having to play the children of a lesser God in the Championship, they appointed the untried Alan Shearer to dig them out of a hole. The hole, as you might have guessed, remained undug.

Also in the press on Sunday there's an interview with the once-forgotten Arsenal man Tomas Rosicky. He's speaking to Steve Tongue of the Independent about his injury hell.

"I think it's getting better and better," he said after playing for almost 70 minutes of Tuesday's Champions' League win over Olympiacos. "I need more games but it looks good and I'm happy I'm back in the team. Of course you miss these nights, and you miss the Premier League as well. I missed everything so it is good to be back."