Well, Arsenal need a defensive midfielder before the seasons starts, so we suppose it was only a matter of time before they were linked with former skipper Patrick Vieira.

The Frenchman has been targeted by Tottenham as he looks to get himself ready to play at South Africa in 2010; and the Sun have reported that manager Arsene Wenger is keen to bring him back to the club he loves instead.

Arsenal haven't won a bean since he left in 2005 and, although it would go against his policy of signing young players and developing them first, Wenger is probably as keen as the fans are for the side to return to their glory days.

Speaking of unexpected returns... Kevin Keegan could be being lined up by a potential suitor of Newcastle. The Sun are really happy with themselves for their stories surrouding former greats today and reckon that the Toon hero will sign if a Dubai tycoon succeeds with a £100m bid for the troubled club.

Maybe they'll bring back Alan Shearer to play up front too.

If everyone is a little bored of the Xabi Alonso saga, the Daily Mail can help you out. They think the deal to take the Liverpool man to Real Madrid is done and that the Reds are already lining up replacements.

Rafa Benitez is apparently preparing a £12m bid for Wigan midfielder Lee Cattermole and will offer Hull £5.5m for defender Michael Turner - although both of the players' clubs have reiterated that they have no desire to sell either of them in recent weeks.

One man who won't be going back to Liverpool is Robbie Keane. The Irishman is back at Spurs, but even though he says he's really quite happy with the signing of Peter Crouch, he won't be if he doesn't get a game. The Daily Mail say that Aston Villa are monitoring the situation - although they didn't seem that interested the last time.

Villa are also tracking West Ham and England defender Matthew Upson, as they need to replace Zat Knight with someone. A £12m bid is the best they can offer and Upson might be keen to play in Europe.

The Daily Mirror seem to think Martin O'Neill is keen to pair Upson with Portsmouth defender Sylvain Distin though, and that he is ready to offer £4.5m for the 30-year-old.

The Daily Star have picked up some Portsmouth news too, but only really as an excuse to use the 'SPLIT OVER NIKOLA FEE' headline. Apparently Croatian forward Nikola Kalinic's move to Fratton Park is being held up over the method of payment for the £5.5m fee. We suggest American Express.

And finally, the secret behind Fulham's recent rise has been revealed by Danny Murphy. And it's notthing to do with Roy Hodgson. No, it's all about Pilates, although the midfielder wasn't exactly glowing in his praise for the new system, saying: ''We're doing specialist work, Pilates stuff. It's not my favourite. I'd rather be doing other things.''