The Soccernet office was full of guffaws and giggling on Monday when news broke that Juventus were preparing a bid for West Ham United sharp-shooter Carlton Cole.

Watch out Serie A, you don't know what's coming.

But hang on! Hold your horses! Claudio Ranieri has not gone stark raving bonkers just yet. Ok, he may know good old Carlton from their Chelsea days but Juve have denied all knowledge of such an outrageous transfer.

Following on from this morning's superb insight, Pascal Chimbonda has, and God knows why, been resigned by Tottenham Hotspur and is joined by Chelsea's Carlo Cudicini.

No other developments from this AM's tittle-tattle then, so what else have people been making up on Monday?

The Daily Telepgraph has bad news for Arsenal as they report Andrei Arshavin would prefer a move to Spain.

Hold on! The Times says Arshavin is praying for a move to the Emirates. Well, someone's lying!

BBC Sport seems to be the only organisation reporting that West Ham have signed, sealed and delivered Brescia striker Savio Nsereko in what is said to be a record transfer. Even their official website is hush-hush on that right now.

It looks like Bolton Wanderers could be heading back into the transfer market after signing Mark Davies (!) from Wolverhampton Wanderers. The Guardian is reporting a club record bid for Miguel Veloso of Sporting Lisbon.

Newcastle United's creaking defence could be helped out by Stephen McManus of Celtic, claims BBC Sport.

RickySbragia is getting angry now. With Tottenham boss 'Arry Redknapp chasing Kenwyne KJ Jones left, right and centre the Sunderland boss is adamant he's keeping the striker. The Times shares his frustration.